Current train of thought:

Bjaaaaaaaaaa if this paper were for anything but Spanish I'd be pissed that I'm up this late and not quite 3/4 of the way done. Sure, it's only a little past 11, but I'm getting up at like 5:30 for jazz band tomorrow and I do enjoy sleeping.

Luckily all I'm doing right away tomorrow is playing jazz, finishing Victoria's Spanish translation, helping Izaac study for his Spanish final, and going to Spanish. And, you know, seeing my friends and maybe playing pep band tunes. But. Spanishspanishspanish yaaaayyyyy. Totally makes everything worth it.

I'm such a nerd. xD

Oh, P.S. Sid and I are dating! Story later, and by later I mean after finals. For now, back to Spanish! Hurrah!

Today was indeed another snow day. I spent the vast majority of it accomplishing absolutely nothing again because I'm a terrible person like that (no really, I feel incredibly guilty about it), wrote a few drabbles in the afternoon, then went to Matt's.

Having had no human interaction besides with my mother and Izaac for two days – not that I'm complaining, but it would have been nice to see Dad for more than sixty seconds, during which he told me I should watch the Cosby Show more often – at first I was mostly like, "Hur hurr, you have a fire. Hey it's Pappy! Hey Pappy, it's the boooot!" and so on. Because I am a social being like that.

Then Sid got his car stuck down the block, got it unstuck, and came in, and because we are so logical we all went back outside again...

What do four of the smartest people in the junior class do when they have a snow day?
They go out in the dark and try to reenact World War I as a snowball fight... in dry snow that doesn't pack.

So really Lichtenstein (Ryann) made snow angels while Britain and Spain (Matt and I) shared a pair of snowshoes and learned that they really work best when one person is wearing both snowshoes. But between the places where my left foot kept going through and the big spot where Matt fell over, we did leave some nice footprints. The trenches were very nice, too, though we didn't get to really use them.

I spent the rest of the night having flash-forwards about fifteen years while Matt sulked over cookbooks and Sid looked up prices for flights from New York City to Buenos Aires.

I love my friends.

carneillian: Thank you for the snowflake cookie! That made me smile. (:

dorianxface: Thank you for posting that video! Haha, it was awesome. Just thought I'd throw that out there since I used it in my header...

Well... we got 4th place in One-Acts on Saturday, and I am beyond okay with that! Sure, we didn't win, but given that for the last two years we'd gotten dead last, fourth is pretty damn good. Plus that put us only one place behind the absolutely amazing rendition of The Laramie Project that basically should have won, but of course Kearney won instead. I guess they were all right, and it was extremely surreal seeing my two friends from the Green Day concert doing handstands together in long underwear.

Sunday and Monday were business as usual. Somehow when I think of winter, I always think of running up to the theater door through the snow and the wind, clutching a coat and purse.

Speaking of which, today was a snow day! I only got to sleep in for an hour or so because I had to puppy-sit, and I got super duper bored almost immediately and, although we'd all agreed already to do movies and sledding at my house, nobody could leave their houses so that failed. Instead, only Izaac came over and we watched Ferris Bueller's Day Off and cuddled. No complaints; thank God for friends who only live three blocks away!

My fingers are crossed for another day off tomorrow, simply because when the snow stops falling (it's been going for a good 13 or 14 hours now!) we will all go sledding, plus I remembered belatedly that Izaac has a sauna and now my goal for the winter is to use it.

Absolutely nothing has gotten done today apart from the aforementioned, and I can't decide if I'm okay with that, but I don't suppose that indecision will change anything anyway.

Whoa, looks like my wishlist definitely got posted! Hello, all you new LJ friends. I'm posting this really quickly since caecandy is here and contributing, but in a little while I'll go back and look at all my emails and friend you back; promise! (:

For the record, my entries aren't usually this ADHD. Haha.


Aaaanyway, we just got back to my house from taking some slightly burnt cookies to Izaac. There were two verdicts reached from this experience.

Verdict 1: That house is a third dimension and the pantry is a fourth dimension within it. Pappy did the Time Warp with Izaac's mom, while he wore his mother's coat and a very cut-off cutoff and danced back and forth (pigeon/Trent/Matt but not the KKK!) and I continued to compare Tim Bob to Tim Curry. Then we had story time and I interrupted Izaac's story with rapping until he got very sad and pulled the silly-looking winter coat over his head while feeling his cheeks. We closed in on Pappy rubbing our cheeks just to upset her, and then he got us cups to put over our ears and the whole thing was just ridiculous and surreal.

Verdict 2: Everything is going to be all right.
He can be our friend, and we can just be friends, and it will be just fine and dandy.

Dream time!

In my most recent dream, I enumerated to Kaitlyn all the reasons she's fake and I can't stand her, partly by quoting Say Anything at her.

Brandon in my theater class dreamed last night that I mugged him! I think that's superb.

District One-Acts are tomorrow. We're hosting and I'm actually pretty excited. There shall be updates.

And lastly, everyone has been buying my raffle tickets! It's funny, cause it's really not that important to me now, but it's still just wonderful (if a bit confusing at first) when Burchess stops me in the hallway to hand me a dollar.

Studying voles can be violent!

If this isn't nice, what is?

Two nights ago, I dreamed that Lance and Lucas (or two people doing bad imitations of them; it was dark) kidnapped me and made me stand very still outside a bus. Then Emily Meyer held me at gunpoint from behind, but it started to rain so I put up the hood on my jacket, and when she couldn't see my face I mouthed "help me" at people driving by, and this family in a van picked me up and drove away real fast and took me to a mall with them.

Today I had heart-to-hearts with about a million people instead of doing any homework before rehearsal, and apparently in 8 days it will be Lance's birthday. I hope he crab-attacks Kordik's garbage bags...

Tomorrow, Steph will have been dead for one year.

And the administrators, fine and sensitive people that they are, thought today would be a perfectly okay day to have as survivor of Columbine come and talk to us about death and destruction and a little bit of suicide. Thaaaaanks, guys. I'm really not into the whole Friends of Rachel thing – has anyone else heard of this? It seems like they're just capitalizing on their daughter's death, and today there were actually forms to order t-shirts and rucksacks and such which I thought was flat-out tacky. I don't know about most people, but personally I don't need a 45-dollar windbreaker to help me perform acts of kindness.

The only difference between martyrdom and suicide is press coverage, indeed.

On a happier note, my mom told me yesterday how exams in med school are basically like really involved Choose Your Own Adventure stories. Now I know for sure what I want to do with my life!

"Even at my most eloquent I'm no martyr."

I'm not one to listen to the radio that much, at least not the stations we have here locally, but over this break I've taken to setting my alarm clock to radio instead of annoying beeping sound. Soooo this morning I woke up to the words:
The dudes are linin' up cause they hear we got swagger
but we kick 'em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger.

And I was just – ???

Maybe you guys have all heard this song and don't find it perplexing (I looked it up and it's Tik Tok by Kesha), but I'm just sort of bemused here for three reasons.

i. I don't know how much I'd enjoy a party full of Mick Jagger lookalikes. Wouldn't that be pretty creepy?
ii. The rest of the song is all about let's get crunk and wear expensive clothes till the po-po shut us down and shit... and the title and the artist's name are both spelled "unconventionally," i.e. wrong... I know I'm part of this generation and all and I probably sound really old and grouchy, but seriously? The vast majority of the kids listening to this crap probably don't know who Mick Jagger even is.
iii. Dan Agger is waaay more attractive than Mick Jagger, would've fit the syllables and rhyme scheme just as well, and is probably equally mystifying to the potential audience. Why not use Dan, huh?

End of music nerd rant. I actually need to go write a column about suicide and why you shouldn't ever hate on music... Ha, wow, I'm a hypocrite. Then practicing some Jane Eyre duettage with Victoria and pie with my best friend! Should be an all right day. (:

Things that have changed since when I posted this morning
1. I now have an official pair of Booty Call Socks. It was unintentional but is now undeniable.
2. The speech team has a giant wooden spoon for a mascot, and I am the Keeper of the Spoon. It's great for holding and saying in falsetto, "Mah spoon is too big."

My weeks have been following a pattern lately: Schoolweek of meaningless work and tedium, rehearsals every day, then a speech meet, then Izaac, then homework and Pappy, then back to school to wait for the next weekend.

I can't say I mind it at all.

We're actually on Thanksgiving break right now. The usual suspects went out to Sid's last night to bake, and bake we did. In the end we had red velvet cake (and blood batter everywhere) and brownie bites with peanut butter chips and angel food cupcakes and an angel food cake and I was all whipped-creamy and cakey and gross. We watched South Park and Harold and Kumar because Sid wouldn't let me watch the Liverpool game...

Luke and I got pulled over and he got a 100-something-dollar speeding ticket on the way home, and things fell repeatedly into my lap and got cake all over everywhere even more. I'm still laughing about it.

If you ask me in the future to remember this Thanksgiving break, here is what I will probably think of first: Me and Izaac standing in his basement, hands on each other's forearms.
Me. Do we have time?
Him. It's up to you.
Me. Luke. Is in. Your pantry.

And meanwhile,
Tim Bob the Yelling Transvestite Pirate. Who's there?
Luke. Oh hey. I was passing through and really needed a bathroom.
TBTYTP. There's an intruder in the house.
Cindy. No, that's just Sarah!
TBTYTP. No, it's an intruder.
Luke. Sorry.
Cindy. Oh. So it is.
[awkwardness]
Me & Izaac. [come back upstairs]
Luke & TBTYTP. [are standing awkwardly in the kitchen]
Me. Uhhhh soccer soccer let's talk about soccer even though nobody but me likes soccer soccer I like it soccer soccer.
Cindy. [appears]
Me. Aaaah, you're behind me! What's up?
Cindy. Well Izaac said you'd be bringing some goodies –
Me. And an intruder.
Luke. Hi, I'm Goodies.
Cindy. – and I said, tomorrow? And he said, no. Tonight.


...yeah, I realized a while back that there's no way my life is really happening and that this must be some sort of work of fiction. Last night just proved it.

So bottom line is we were going to play some more chess today, but he was too tired after practice and his padres weren't home and his abuelos might be coming and all this other crap... and I got all upset and lonely... so in a fit of near-hysteria I texted Trent (which I haven't since he asked me for pictures a while back) and said "I don't suppose you're coming home for Thanksgiving."

And he is! He's on a bus down here right now! Trent's coming home!

And Pappy is on my bed installing things and we're going to go work on the duet with Mallory The Amazing Speecher in a little while here and, after that, tonight is that night where we stand in a freezing warehouse full of newspapers and count to twenty in loud voices while trying to find more garbage bags. I FREAKIN' LOVE IT.

Since you left me, I'm so alone
Now you're comin', you're comin' on home...

I'm coming to terms
I'm starting to learn
This ain't all it's cracked up to be
'Cause I'm using you, you're using me
It's never as easy as we believe

Carolina Liar, Coming to Terms.

Dear whoever's watching,
Please make this not come true.

Now onward to dreams!

#1
I was sitting in a hotel room with Seth Meharg, talking about some rather objectionable topics. A cop walked in and started interrogating him, so I had to leave. I went over to Liz's hotel room, where she was putting her shoes on in the dark, and we talked for a long time. Then Piss walked in and started talking to us, too.

#2
Jenna was wearing Brooke's pimpin' purple-and-gold shoes that have her name on the backs of them. That's all I remember.

Last Friday the 13th was Trent's birthday (typical). He was turning 19 and finding whole new levels of drunkenness.

We also had our first speech meet – at Norfolk. Pappy and I got 4th, 3rd, and 2nd in our rounds with the duet, and Hannah and Victoria finaled and the team as a whole got 5th out of 13. Apparently this is the first time we've placed as a team since Hastings last year, so knock on wood but it bodes well.

Then of course we got lost on the way home and I think it took maybe two hours longer than it should have? But that figure might not be right. Bus rides, to me, are like being in limbo. Time doesn't matter and location doesn't matter. You're just on a bus. I love it so much.

The next day I finally got to go learn chess from Izaac and, hahaha, that went exceptionally well.

Oh, and! I did my jazz audition right before we left for Norfolk on Friday morning. I'm really glad I decided to do it then, because instead of Eckhardt and Speed and whoever else with nobody else allowed in, it was Eckhardt and Sarah Buck and some people sitting around on the couches and putting stands away. It really de-stressed me and consequently I made jazz ensemble! Happy happy happy.

Uh, skipping ahead to things that are interesting, I guess our Oasis won the Vets' Day poster contest for our grade, which was a pleasant surprise, especially for someone like me who'd never even been involved in the poster-making before. Erica and I had said we'd bring donuts for everyone even if (when) we didn't win, and we didn't know we'd won, so we decided to tell Mrs. Rohrich we had to get the donuts from the band room... and then go and buy some from Skagway. So today we did, Erica and Hannah and I, and Mrs. Rohrich believed us and everyone was very happy about the donuts, and it was the first time I'd ever skipped and it was epic. (Then Mrs. Rohrich told me that Luke and I should love each other. I didn't tell her that he's been kissing all of Piss's lesbians.)

Three periods later the school caught on fire. Betsy and I spent most of the time we were outside tickling the people around us.

"Tickling is the opium of the masses," I said to Izaac in a text (I was trying to convince him to tickle the people on his side of the building instead of making fun of them as is his wont). It just sprung into my head at the time, but it's from something Karl Marx said – that religion is the opium of the masses. I heard about it from Kurt Vonnegut, who wished to point out that Marx didn't mean it was bad or addictive, but that it offered them some relief from the tangible world.

So as Vonnegut says that Marx would say, tickling is Tylenol for a lot of unhappy people, and I'm glad they have it.

Hey f-list, wanna hear a secret?
Yesterday at 11:11 I wished for Izaac and Kasey to break up soon.
That night I opened my phone to tell him that a group of goats is called a mob (aren't goats great?!) and instead learned that they had broken up.

That hoebag's a winner.

I'm feeling pretty snazzy about Norfolk tomorrow... now I guess I should go work on feeling jazzy 'cause all things considered, the audition is more important. Than, like, everything.

Typos in the following do not belong to me, but I can't edit them out or re-copy and paste it 'cause this box won't stop blinking. :(

BLuhhhh.

98 on my monologue – I couldn't figure out when to sit down.
Duet is memorized.
Lines for one-act are memorizedish.
I need to go work on jazz.

Two days till Norfolk.

Whores, whores, there are some here.

Dreamed that Addie's friends tried to invite me somewhere.

I'm so tired, and my allergic reaction to Nate isn't helping.

However nothing has gone horribly wrong yet!

edited because I remembered something awesome

I went to get lunch with all the other newspaper kids today (which I don't do very often anymore, but no matter) and on the way back, I noticed a little red Dreaming of a Nightmare flyer at the bottom of one of the display cases.  I thought it was kind of weird, especially since I'm pretty sure they emptied those cases out and reorganized them last month.  

When we were dismissed to get ready for the parade, I texted Trent and told him about it.   "Haha still?" he said.  "That was a show next to Valentine's Day."  and as I was typing a reply, another one came from him: "My junior year."

DoaN is the new Dumbledore.  They will not truly be gone from this school until all those who believe in them are gone.

Last night (this morning?) I dreamed that I was having lunch with Izaac and the czar of Russia.

Then I woke up, went back to sleep, and dreamed that the entire newspaper staff had read Airport Monday Morning and was critiquing me on it.  It was actually really helpful.

For various deadlines approaching this week, I need to:
    - memorize my monologue
    - memorize my lines in the one-act
    - memorize my assassins duet
    - be a winner at my jazz band audition

It's a good week to be a fine arts kid, no?

Um.  Got 2nd Do-Gooder in Christmas Carol this year... so basically I spent two years in a nameless role just to get another, slightly larger and plottier, one as a junior.  AWESOME.

Theater was hilariously awkward.  Half the people in there weren't even in the class, and that includes me.
(We set Kazz on fire yesterday.)

Some sort of playoff game tonight against Elkhorn.  I'm not entirely sure of the significance of it, but I think losing would get us out of the running for something, and anyway I'm pretty excited.  

Honestly don't have much to say.



"What the hell has my life come to? Whatever it's come to... it's pretty awesome."  – Alex DeLeon

Hey f-list, have any of you ever read A Prayer For Owen Meany?  It's by John Irving, the same guy who wrote The World According To Garp and many other books that involve bears and wrestling.  If you haven't read it, you should, but I really hope at least one of you has, 'cause keeping that boot in my room last night felt like the dressmaker's dummy that Owen has, and nobody but my mom gets what I mean by that.

Anyway.  Stumbled through my day getting things done ten minutes before deadlines.  I don't think I failed either of my tests.  Lucas found another advice column headline about boyfriends who cheat with men and cut it out for the Yam Book.  I wonder if the reason so many people submit questions to Dear Abby asking "Is my boyfriend/husband gay because he cheated on me with another man?" is that so many of those poor guys are dating women who write to Dear Abby for advice. :\

The first One-Act rehearsal was dees, I guess.  It just doesn't feel sensational to me, but after all it was just a read-through so hopefully it didn't set the tone for the next month and a half.  On that note I need to start working on my jazz band audition music.  Behhhhh.

Took the boot back after rehearsal.  The entire time we were there was like something out of a story – the kind of story Addie'd read, haha, except maybe she'd find it offensive.  Not gonna lie, it was pretty adorable the way we both grinned like state was the biggest inside joke ever.  I probably should stop before this kid becomes my drug – oh wait, he already is.  I'll just bide my time now, because if he really is the new Brian it'll be another three years before he finds his Katrina (did you know they've been dating for a year now?!) and if I had more of an ass I'd apparently be perfect.  Absolutely perfect.  Gourds!

ITEDs tomorrow!  On the one hand I'd love to be sleeping in – and having all those classes with seniors and sophomores who are all pleased with themselves isn't helping – but on the other, this is the last standardized test I'll ever have to take and not worry about.  I plan to relish it, because after this it's just ACTs and SATs and APs and MCATs and all that other shit that actually affects my life.

Also I have a Liverpool hoodie now, so I get to bother Logan with it, and I'm having lunch at 7:38 with Betsy and Erica!

Time for sociology and a shower.

(I'm not the desperate type!)  I heart me some Fall Out Boy.

So uhhh yeah.  A few things that I've found entertaining lately, because this is a DESIGNATED LIGHTHEARTED POST.

Betsy and I decided that the safest place in the entire school to have anything bad happen to you is in front of the bathrooms in the 300 hallway because that's halfway between Burchess's and Cronin's rooms and they just exude force fields of awesomeness and capability.  I guess that will only make sense to like 3 people on my f-list, but that's okay.

Yesterday, Pappy and Luke and I went over to Izaac's to steal his boot for the Finny part of mine and Pappy's costume.  Somebody murdered his fucking scarecrow, as Luke said.  It was awkward enough seeing him bootless and wearing glasses – vulnerable, in a way – and being in his house.  It was a lot like being in Logan's room to borrow that shirt, but all mixed up out of order 'cause I've never been to Izaac's before.  But he told Luke that he looked like Sid, and Luke said no, he looks like Tom Cruise, and Izaac said oh yeah, 6th period lunch makes up stories about Luke being in action movies, and Luke was flattered, and I said you're not even in 6th period lunch! and Pappy laughed.  And then his dad came home, and Luke got on the floor, and I told YELLING TIM BOB that he looked like Tim Curry, and I meant in Muppet Treasure Island but he and Pappy thought of Rocky Horror so everyone thought I was calling Izaac's dad a sweet transvestite... then we talked about how their pantry is a time machine, and Tim Bob the Pirate and I happily discussed the merits of vanilla wafers and how many calories are in them if you eat them with yogurt while Izaac did some elaborate pantomime just outside my line of vision, but I think it was of various ways to kill himself.  Pappy was having a breakdown over NaNo the whole time, I think, so she didn't say much, and then Luke tried to steal an alarmingly accurate rubber bone and shut the door on me and I was holding the boot and couldn't catch it.

So basically it was quite weird.

TIM BOB will give you, er, bees.

On the bright side, I didn't think "Aaaaaaahahaha I've touched your son in really inappropriate places!" until after we left, and I'm glad, because I'd much rather call him a crossdresser than freeze up completely and start snickering.  The aforementioned son is going to teach me how to play chess after I see the musical on Sunday, which again reminds me of Logan because we all know what happened when that Manc said he was going to teach me to play poker.

Hey f-list, how terrible of an idea is strip chess?

Also, Luke and I are going to see Where The Wild Things Are in a little while here, so expect some feedback on that... then people are coming over here, then we're all going over to Sid's, and I'll be wearing a sweater-vest.  Good times.

What is this "normal sleep schedule" you speak of?

...anyway.  Let's see.  Today, I bonded with trumpet players and AJ.  I hugged my adorable gay classmate who is moving on Sunday, and I watched Krisann freak out about chicks because yes, they are alive.  I understood the history review and made Lucas laugh, and damn his dimples are gonna kill me one of these days.  Sid had another breakdown (soon he'll be on his 19th and I can sing the Stones song!) and as per usual I was assumed to be responsible for contacting him.  Which I am, and I was all nervous and twitchy till I knew he was all right, but still.  My Liverpool hoodie and scarf came in the mail, and Trent decided to get back in touch with me!  Those two things have made my day absolutely brilliant.  Also I got a haircut and fought with Izaac 'cause he brought up his girlfriend for no reason at all when he probably should have known I'd be un poco touchy about it, yeah?

My Halloween costume has evolved from The Other Bikers with Pappy to Tyler Durden and the narrator with Victoria to Tyler Durden and the narrator with Pappy to Finny and Gene with Pappy, and with Finny and Gene I believe it shall stay.  Literary reference Halloween costumes are the shit, and so apparently is a sentence on one of Mr. Cronin's aplicaciones.

Moony is here now, so I'm going to go interact with her instead of sitting on my ass (or someone else's ass! how awkward) in front of Pierre-the-laptop.

I can't believe I'm really up at this time just to finish a chemistry project.  Wow... welcome to the rest of my life.

Thanks, Avogadro.

Goodnight, everyone.

I don't actually have anything to say about today.  I just wanted to post something with that subject line.  Kinda makes me miss oldschool!Cobra...

It looks like my last entry was two Thursdays ago, so let me recount the most whorish week of my life starting with that Friday.

( forever, forever is a mighty long time ) 
Yo soy lo superfantastic.

P.S.  Luke and I are starting a band called Something Dave Something The Robot, just the two of us with the White Stripes and Ivy League as inspiration.